who are you and what have you done with cheetah girl?

i have really been freaking my friends out lately. instead of my usual "let's fucking rage!" battle call followed by pounding my fist down on the nearest surface, my new repeated catch phrase has been "i want to be engaged." i don't know what it is, maybe it is the feeling of finally making my own house a home, or the fact that i have made new friends who have more goals and dreams than simply a happy hour and 2am burrito run, or perhaps it is just an alien invasion in my heart that has melted the ice and planted seeds of domesticity. i have no clear cut answer for it; all i know is it is equal parts freaking me the hell out as well as finally really making me want to grow up and explore the world. i would have never thought a year ago, heck.. 6 months ago, i would ever want anything more than a fortune 500 career, a slew of steady non.commital significant others, and a fully stocked couture closet... and then these following desires came in from left field and turned my world upside down. 

{that person who is so right for you, who makes you crazy in all the good and bad ways and when people see you they just know you two belong, even before you do -- charlotte's take on carrie and big} 

{a rock that is so sparkly and perfect it makes your heart flutter 

and blinds the car next to you on a sunny day at a stop light}

{a unique home you can call your own that people just associate with you where you can make memories with family and friends; good and bad, happy and sad}

{while i know i will have a substantially uneven stake in the closet, i really do think it is important for every one in a family to have their own sanctuary. hence; not only do i encourage and support a man room, i respect it and the ideology behind it.. back to 1920s smoking parlors after dinner when women drank tea and played cards and men drank scotch and smoked cigars each talking about their own worlds}

{making halloween costumes, buying clothes, supporting endeavors: stella blake}

{raising a perfect gentleman who has swag and class: brooks elliot}

{a subconscious desire revealed via halloween 2010; 

betty draper/madmen housewife??}